Dec 5

Dec 5 Same Time, Next Christmas

As kids, Olivia and Jeff visited Hawaii with their families every Christmas. When the childhood sweethearts reunite at the same resort years later, they quickly discover that their chemistry is still strong — but life has added new obstacles. Will they need to say aloha to each other… or can they say aloha to love?

Same+Time+Next+Christmas.jpg — CHRISTMAS CLICHÉS:

Opens w/ City Scene
Deceased Parent
Rekindled Romance
Cute, Precocious Child
Tree Buy & Trim
Evil Fiance
Carolers
Mistletoe
Ends w/ Kiss or Ring

Our Thoughts

The #3 movie on our 2019 premieres list, “Same Time, Next Christmas” promised good-looking stars and Rekindled Romance. And when Freeform pushed up the launch date and decided it was worthy of primetime network television (take that, Thursday Night Football), we got even more excited.

We’ll keep this brief: “Same Time, Next Christmas” was a household disappointment.

Municipal architect Olivia (Lea Michele, who shockingly doesn’t sing) spends every Christmas in Hawaii with her family. The Williams family has the same tradition, so Olivia and Jeff Williams (Charles Michael Davis, better in “No Sleep Til Christmas”) spend many holidays, and their first kisses, with each other.

A Deceased Parent changes all that, and Jeff ignores Olivia’s outreach. Yet, when he appears on the beach 15 years later with pictures of his Cute, Precocious Daughter, romance quickly blooms under hidden waterfalls and a sexy version of “Silent Night” by Luther Vandross.

But all is not well in Hawaiian Christmasland. Jeff’s estranged wife calls and wants to give their marriage another shot, so he leaves Olivia hanging once again. Quick cut to the next Christmas where Jeff shows up single and Olivia brings along her fitness-loving boyfriend. Time to restart the will-they-won’t-they dance.

What’s most baffling is how unrealistic the conflict is. (And that’s coming from two people who adore a …Santa? moment or a plot rooted in unrelated identical twins.) Who doesn’t use social media to keep tabs on people?! Olivia’s surprise at Jeff’s single status means she hasn’t been Facebook stalking him, which is standard behavior for childhood sweethearts. Plus, we’re meant to believe that they haven’t texted or emailed once in over a year after sharing steamy kisses? Not even a “Hey! Will I see you on the beach this holiday?”

We don’t buy it.

Thank goodness for Olivia’s hippie, sex-hungry parents played by Nia Vardalos and the fiancé from “Father of the Bride.” Their snarky commentary about love and veganism (“You can’t even taste the animal parts!”) stole the spotlight from our leads. Same goes for Jeff’s dad—his love for football metaphors had Rob Googling “Doug Flutie passes” when he should have been caring about the Ending w/ Kiss or Ring.

It’s not a bad movie per se, but it’s joyless and should’ve been far better. Stream a Christmas episode of “Glee” instead.

Rob's Final Take: Not Very Merry
Dull. Frustrating. Buttoned-up. Beautiful backdrops aside, this movie couldn’t have been less Hawaiian….or less Christmas-y.

Jess's Final Take: Not Very Merry
It checks some boxes but in the wrong ways. Give me a movie starring the parents—I’d watch “Christmas Libido” over this flick any day.